Shape Up? How About Grow Up?!

Charlie Sheen is just like that guy we all knew going through high school - he’s good looking, he’s charming, he’s arrogant as hell, and he thinks that the world is his champagne glass here for him to drink from it. Everyone knows that he has gone through his own life leaving some of it rather tainted and I think the general public had even started to like him. He’s married now…not to a psycho this time…he’s got kids and more on the way…It seemed as though his troubled past was finally behind him and he may actually be starting to think like a grown up and settle down. But sadly, this is not the case.

Brooke Mueller, Charlie’s new wifey and the Two and a Half Men star have just recently come out announcing that not only are they expecting but it’s to be twins, and with the help of a few scientific advancements they will most likely be boys. So what better time is there than to fly to Las Vegas for a good old-fashioned weekend hangin with the boys and getting lapdances?! Yep, Charlie Sheen sickens me and this is why. From Celebrity Dirty Laundry,

“Star magazine is reporting that bad boy & reformed playboy Charlie Sheen fled to Las Vegas on Oct. 25 to blow off steam — leaving his wife who is preggers at home. Apparently, he certainly wasn’t looking like a married man with twin sons on the way as he surrounded himself with pretty young women, partied with Spin City costar Michael Boatman at Privé and got lap dances at the strip club Spearmint Rhino. I guess a leopard does not change his spots! “He’s still carrying on and boozing,” a source tells Star.

His weekend away from Brooke did more harm than good for his marriage. When she got wind of what Charlie was up to in Las Vegas, “she went off the deep end,” and told Charlie to either Shape Up or GET OUT!”

Now, I’m fairly liberal in my thinking when it comes to married men and strip clubs. I don’t think that they are forbidden places and by simply thinking of entering one, a man has already cheated on his wife. I do however, don’t feel that it is necessary for a married man to be getting lapdances at strip clubs and I don’t think it’s necessary to go to a strip club at all when you’re wife is at home growing babies. The nine months of pregnancy are a special form of punishment for a woman and the husband needs to be by her side taking care of her whenever he possibly can. And good Lord, what was he thinking pissing off a pregnant woman?!? Not smart, Charlie. Not smart at all.

Just when I was Starting to Like Him

I have always been sort of on the fence about how I feel about Charlie Sheen. I definitely have never loved him, have barely liked him and then when things turned so bad for him and Denise Richards and they both started acting like complete juveniles, I started to completely hate them both. However, I really, really hated Denise and the fact that Sheen had gone above and beyond to make her completely writhe in her seat, first by marrying Wife #3 Brooke Mueller and then getting her pregnant - WOW! I could just imagine what a blow that was to poor, little Denise, who was busy sending her to children to therapy and lying about their father. So when Brooke and Charlie announced that they were having twins, I thought it just didn’t get any better. BUT - then I found out something that I just don’t think is cool. From People,

“Brooke and Charlie are expecting twins, and they are so excited,” Moira Fiore, who spent time with Brooke last week, tells PEOPLE. “Obviously, I am floating on air.”

Fiore says that the couple “think the twins are boys” but aren’t sure.

“Brooke has had all day morning sickness but is coming to the end of the first trimester so she hopefully will feel better soon,” says Fiore of her 31-year-old daughter. “It has been rough for her.”

Still, “Brooke looks so beautiful,” adds her mom. “She is just glowing.”

Sheen, 42, who is already a father to three girls, has expressed interest in having a son. In August, Brooke told PEOPLE she thought they would have a boy. “Odds are it’s a boy, but we’ll be happy with either sex,” she said at the time.”

I just don’t like it when people go to these extreme measures to make sure that they get the ‘right’ baby, or babies, in this case. And then Brooke says that she’ll be happy ‘with either sex.’ Obviously not, since you had to involve advanced technology in your conception. For absolutely no reason! I think medical advances are great and have given many women who were once without options, open doors that weren’t once available to them. But it’s not like it was these babies or no babies, it was ‘these babies, and they need to be boys.’ It’s just so wrong! Do celebrities really not have enough that they feel as though they need to take fate into their own hands as well?

Driving Denise Crazy

Charlie Sheen has announced that he and his wife, Brooke Mueller are expecting and although the news isn’t really about Denise Richards, you know damn well that she will do her utmost to make sure that it is! She’s just so extremely childlish that I’m sure she’ll use this new streak of jealousy to call Charlie a horrible father and throw despicable accusations at him. Charlie and Brooke however, are of course ecstatic about it. From the Gossip Girls,

“Brooke and I are thrilled! She’s the best stepmom Sam, Lola and Cassandra could ever hope for,” Sheen, 42, says, referring to his daughters Sam, 4, and Lola, 2 (with ex-wife Denise Richards), and Cassandra, 23 (with ex-girlfriend Paula Profitt)

The “Major League” actor adds: “Seeing her love and affection with those three, I know she’ll be an amazing mom. Unless I bat 100%, perhaps a boy awaits us.”

These two did get pregnant very quickly, as they were just married this past May. And although they were confronted with pregnancy rumors back in June, they assured everyone that there was no bun in the oven. They even said that there were no plans for one so obviously, this comes as a surprise to everyone. Congratulations, Charlie and Brooke, you’re about to be inducted into the baby bump hall of fame!

The Latest on Divorces and Divorcees

It seems that the world of hookups and breakups in Hollywood has been busy focusing on the breakup side of things. Just when people are starting to get over the Madonna/Guy Ritchie drama, all kinds of celebrities are coming out of the woodwork announcing separations and divorces. Others who have recently joined the list of famous divorcees are speaking about their recent turn of events. And it’s not all what you would think.

Perhaps the only divorce that may be as ugly as the one between Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen is the one between Hulk Hogan and wife, Linda Boella. Hogan himself was surprised in November when she filed for divorce and from there it turned into the makings of a bad accident that you have to watch. Quite literally as well since the family started to fall apart shortly after Nick’s accident. Now Hulk Hogan has gone public saying that he wished he was still with his wife, even though she has been sleeping with a much younger man. This is one messed up family and I lost the little respect I had for Hogan after remarks he made in regards to Nick’s accident.

And one divorcee who has absolutely no desire to be reunited with her ex is Pink. In her latest video she gladly erases all memories of her former marriage by chainsawing through a heart carved onto a tree with the name of her and ex, Carey Hart. It’s subtle as the tree uses her first name but for all her fans it’s there and there’s also the posting she’s put on her blog where she goes into a bit more detail over who, shortly after her divorce, she called her “best friend.”

And three women who have seen their fare share of heartache are the Dixie Chicks. The recent divorce of singer Emily Robison isn’t the first divorce that the Chicks have seen during their time together of over ten years but it’s just as heartbreaking. I suppose the good news is that there’s bound to be more great Chick material coming out of it!

And just on the heels of his car accident on Sunday night, Morgan Freeman has also announced that he is in the middle of divorce proceedings. The actor has been separated from his wife since 2007 but are now moving proceedings along. Man, what a past few months it’s been for him! On news of his health, he appears to be doing much better!

Kate Hudson is one divorcee who knows that she will be forever tied to her ex, Chris Robinson due to the fact that they share their four-year old son, Ryder. There were reports earlier this week that she was caught kissing him directly after her relationship with Lance Armstrong but nothing has seemed to come from that. As a side note, I think normally she’s stunning but her on the cover of W just looks weird. Sort of superhero/comic-booky. It’s not right though.

Some Kids Just Can’t Play Nice

And in this case, guess who it is? A-GAIN?!? That’s right, our favorite divorced couple, Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen are back at it, both trying to win the “I can play nastier than you can,” game. Fun for everyone, isn’t it? Especially their children, who no doubt are so incredibly screwed up that they’ll never see straight! This time, as usual, they are using those poor children as weapons with Denise saying that Charlie has molested his own children and Charlie turning around and meeting those accusations with a charge - for dragging his name through the mud once again. From Celebitchy,

“A new story tells that Denise was trying to say that she thinks Charlie molested their daughters. Charlie and his lawyers immediately denied it and showed video of the girls acting normal around him and got the “evidence” dismissed .

A source (we hope not a friend of Charlie’s with an ax to grind) told Page Six that Denise only dragged Charlie into court because her reality show is tanking and she’s desperate to drum up excitement even apparently at Charlie’s expense:

“She thinks a court battle would be good for ratings so she wants all overnight visits with the girls ceased, and monitored visits with her nanny. She invited the media circus to the hearing and even wanted reporters in the judge’s chambers - which wasn’t allowed. It’s ridiculous.”

This is not the first source to say that this is all an attempt at boosting her own show and with Denise, it honestly wouldn’t surprise me. Once again, the woman does not think about anything before she does it and she is spending her precious time wondering just how to make a little more money and be just a little bit nastier. God, who else is just so over this?

Denise Richards Ships Her Kids Off to Therapy

You really have to hand it to Denise Richards. Instead of trying to have a somewhat civil divorce from ex-hubby Charlie Sheen, she slanders him in public, throws horrible accusations at him, lies, and is just plain mean. Then, thinking that maybe it’s having some ill repercussions on their two daughters, Sam who’s four and Lola who’s three, she sends them to therapy. Yep! Therapy! From Celebedge,

“It’s very sad that they need to be there, but they do for now,” Denise tells In Touch. “On the other hand, it’s good they have an outlet to deal with their feelings and someone who is just their advocate.” Denise’s outlet for her feelings, apparently, is In Touch magazine.”

Hey, here’s a thought. Why don’t you talk to your kids? Even better, why don’t you stop dragging out your horrible divorce for all the world to see and trying to think of the worst possible things to say about each other? Honestly, how much benefit are young kids going to get out of talking to a shrink? I know that with all their money they probably hired a pediatrics shrink but the case still stands. Denise Richards is proving to the world once again that she doesn’t have a clue about anything - especially parenting!

Charlie Sheen Now a Married Man

On Friday, in a quiet ceremony in Beverly Hills, Charlie Sheen got married to Brooke Mueller. The night marked the third weddding for Sheen who has also been married to model Donna Peele and in 2002 he married Denise Richards, with whom he is now having very ugly and very public fights. Sheen and Mueller have been engaged since last summer and according to the Sydney Morning Herald it was a beautiful ceremony. Here is what they reported,

“The wedding took place in front of 70 guests, including Charlie’s father Martin Sheen, his Two and a Half Men co-star Holland Taylor, and Brooke’s best friend Rebecca Gayheart who was accompanied by her Grey’s Anatomy actor husband Eric Dane.

Charlie’s three daughters Cassandra, 23, Sam, four, and Lola, three, also attended, with Sam and Lola acting as flower girls.

The couple wrote their own vows, and Brooke wore a white Reem Acra gown.

Hours before the wedding, Charlie said: “We love each other and want to spend the rest of our lives together.”

Hopefully this marriage will work out despite the troubles that are surrounding their marriage. Denise Richards is being her same immature self as she and Sheen duke it out in the courtroom for custody of their two daughters, Sam and Lola. Richards is making accusations in court that Sheen has inappropriately touched his daughters, which is just a false accusation that should never be made. She has also called his new marriage a publicity stunt, which couldn’t be funnier considering that Richards herself made sure that she would be in the papers as much as she could just before her horrible new reality show premiered.

Sheen and Mueller are honeymooning in Costa Rica and I wish them nothing but the best.

Richards and Sheen Can’t Play Nice

The whole debacle of Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen is just ridiculous. This is a mess that, their adorable children aside, never should have happened. Generally, stars don’t like to have their personal lives splashed across every magazine and newspaper. But Sheen and Richards seize the opportunity to publicly slander each other and show the entire world just how juvenile they truly are. Richards has decided it’s time to put the attention back on them by now claiming that Sheen faked the entire sperm donor email incident and reportedly, Sheen is hoping that Richards dies…and is telling her about it! From Celebitchy,

“Earlier this week Richards accused Sheen of faking the infamous sperm donor email, after which Charlie Sheen’s friends told the New York Post that Richards was essentially a money grubbing loser. Yesterday Denise responded by claiming Charlie sent her text messages in which he said he hoped she and her father got cancer and died like her mother. “For him to slam me saying I’m exploiting the kids, well, he’s exploited our entire situation,” Richards fumed to us yesterday. She claims Sheen obsessively sends her rage-filled text messages. Click to see Richards reading her favorite newspaper. “Last week, I sent Charlie a text message asking him if he’s going to Family Day [for daughter Sam’s school] and letting him know Sam was sick with a cold,” Richards said. “His response was, ‘I hope you and your worthless retarded father get cancer and join your stupid mom. Rot in hell you [bleeping] whore.’ My mom died of cancer. This is what I deal with on a weekly basis. “He missed Dad’s day at the school and my father had to go in his place. And this is how he talks to me?”

But Richards is not completely innocent in the whole ordeal. She has done her fair share of instigating and I think bringing the sperm donor email back up is really in poor taste. They each need to remember that there are children involved. It’s bad enough when parents fight in the privacy of the home, whether they live there together or not, but doing it so openly and saying such horrendous things is just disrespectful to the family.